She would have been 29 today…
She’s given me 12 years of life that I would never have had – and I’m really not thinking that’s going to stop anytime soon… And the life she’s given me is indescribable to you normal, mortal, human beings – it’s a life I did not understand during my first 39 years… It’s a life that’s so much easier than I’d ever imagined possible. It’s not that there aren’t any problems, or fears – they’re there… But waking up in the morning and being able to breathe, freely – and not being in the constant state of exhaustion that I didn’t even know I was in… I know this is what love feels like.
And a few years after she came into my life, I learned who she was, and her family sent me pictures – and I had a face, and a beautiful smile to go along with everything I’d been feeling – and I can’t not see that smile with me everywhere.
And a few years after that, I met her family, and some of her friends, and the lady who has her heart – and I started learning more about her… And a few years after that – her friends started pouring into my life… And I learned even more about her, through the eyes of people who love her.
At least once or twice, almost every single week – I get a beautiful, little note from one or two of the people who loved her – or I send a little reminder to one of them to make sure they know how I feel about them…
The Sunday before last – I was surrounded by around 30 people who loved her – who lived near her – who grew up with her – who were her classmates, her friends, her volleyball teammates – who taught her – who coached her… Her Mom, her sister, her Godmother and her cousin were here too… Can you imagine how it feels to have so many people who love her, come out to celebrate her with me?
29 years ago today she was born. I had cake today… Most of the people surrounding me know that I take my birthday pretty seriously. And the people who are the closest to me know that her birthday is more special to me than mine has ever been…
A beautiful lady named Deb, who works at Algona Greenhouse, placed flowers on her grave for me today… The card read:
March 7 , 2012
Happy Birthday, Kari!!!
So, talk about a crazy Hustle this year!!! I usually have a handful of people who knew and love you with me - 5 or 6 tops... Last week I had about 30 people who knew and love you, and about 150 other people who never knew you, yet most of them have grown to love you through me... And Alyssa climbed with me, with Tracy - and your Mom and Godmother were waiting at the top...
I sometimes wonder how you would feel about all this... About everyone making a big deal over you... In my heart, I think you're smiling. Your Mom was doing a lot of smiling. And I was so proud to have Alyssa & Tracy in the stairwells with me...
I never knew you, and I miss you. And I was with a whole buncha people who keep you in their hearts, and help me understand who you were... Happy 29th Birthday...
Love, Lungs & Laura